Thoughts of today

My parents and I both have different priorities for what I should do with my life.

For me, music comes first , then homework and finally socializing with friends. 

Today I received a disappointing transcript. I am ranked 56 out of 240. Many thoughts race through my mind why of course that's the top 25% but really is that good enough? 

I was in a state of mixed emotions. I spend atleast two hours practicing in my music and spend the rest on homework. Though sometimes I don't get things accomplished. 

I slack off half the time in education and I'm always constantly involved in music and practicing. I just wonder what would happen if I actually commit to education. 

Yes, I am disappointed that I know I can do better but I'm just overwhelmed and I don't know what to do. 

Music is always first it's something I will be doing all my life. 

I just honestly don't know.

Unknown artist

For all of you that didn't know I use to draw. I don't what happened but I've stopped drawing. I guess drawing was a hobby and since I don't even have time to sleep or do homework I suppose drawing has been removed from my to do list. Enjoy my old drawings. 

Painting

Girl

Naruto

Foot 

Cello 

Frog 

I don't even know. 

Even though I don't draw anymore I still take pictures. To a certain extent I think photography and drawing are similar. Both each show to an idea on a page through an image. 

Popularity

The word "popular" ring in my ears and I cringe to the sound of it. 

In high school there's this ladder. There's the lower class, middle class and the higher class. It's established once you get to the high school. It's just an unwritten conduct.

I'm not a fan of this system but we live in a world where people with money triumphs first and people with none finishes last. 

More money = popularity

In ALHS, our school isn't as bad as other schools. But the system still exists. 

Popular is just a title. I think none of that should matter. 

Loneliness

Loneliness lurks everywhere. It's always there like a shadow. No one can escape it. 

You might be engulfed with friends but no loneliness will strike even then. 

Loneliness brings out sadness but not always. 

Loneliness isn't a bad thing. It's just there. 

Like the air we breath in. 

The sweet smell of finals.

As we draw to a close of semester 1. The idea of finals are etched into everybody's brain. Why of course it's 20% of your grade. Some teachers may choose to not even give finals because even they are stressed to get everything handed in by the due date. As for me it's more stressful because I will be gone the last two days of the semester because I will be at a music festival in Sioux Falls South Dakota in Augustana college. So wish me luck! 

Thoughts of the night

I lay here. The silence console me, the thing that never fails me. In this world where hatred and love coexists. Who is to trust? Backs will be turned, fingers will be crossed. Yet secrets will be shared, hearts will be opened. 

My brain begs for sleep. My eyelids pull the shades down to slumber. 

Voices. 

The cold whispers to my skin. The hairs stand to it's command . I welcome the cold.  

Oh, the new year has begun!

We come to a new year of 2014. New year resolutions are made everywhere. But really who will fulfill those wishes throughout the WHOLE year? If you're going to make a resolution make it reasonable, a goal you can actually reach.

As for me, I haven't made a New Years resolution yet. Maybe I should get on it...